How can I ask someone to do something with me in Japanese?
Suggest doing something together
To suggest doing something together (e.g. to ask someone out), you can use the following grammar pattern:
Verb (masu-form) + ませんか (masenka)
For example,
水族館へ行きませんか。
suizokukan e iki masen ka.
Would you like to go to an aquarium with me?
You can add
一緒に
issho ni
together
to clarify that you want to do it together.
For example,
一緒に水族館へ行きませんか。
Issho ni suizokukan e iki masen ka.
Would you like to go to an aquarium with me?
Note that the grammar pattern ませんか (masenka) can also be used to make suggestions in general, without necessarily implying doing something together (See also: ませんか : Suggest doing something)
It’s the context that distinguishes between their usages.
So, for example,
ガムを食べませんか。
gamu wo tabe masen ka.
Do you want (to eat) some chewing gum?
can be rare to interpret that I want to eat chewing gum with you, can’t it?
How to answer
If you want to accept the invitation,
ええ(ee)、Verb (masu-form) + ましょう (mashou)
Sure, let’s XXX.
is typically used.
For example,
A:
水族館へ行きませんか。
suizokukan e iki masen ka.
Do you want to go to an aquarium with me?
B:
ええ、行きましょう。
Ee iki mashou
Sure let’s go.
You can also say,
いいですね。行きましょう。
iidesune. iki mashou
That sounds nice. Let’s go.
If you want to refuse politely, you can say:
すみません、ちょっと…。
Sumimasen, chotto…
I’m sorry, but…
If you want to refuse more strongly (like someone persistently asks you to go somewhere together on the street), you can say:
すみません、結構です。
Sumimasen, kekkou desu.
I’m sorry, but I don’t want to.
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